by Frank Turk
I'm working out a deal for his release. More later.
I'm working out a deal for his release. More later.
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32 comments:
ack...
Hopefully back for H&T!
Yes, I'm selfish like that.
What are their demands?
I sure hope they're not undocumented!
I knew we should have been worried, when he started making mountains out of mashed potatoes...
I have a few dilithium crystals I can contribute toward negotiating his release, if the aliens are short on fuel.
I can add some gold-pressed latinum to those dilithium crystals.
Remember your Macbook. Job's is either an alien refuge seeking to benefit mankind or his mind is so far ahead of us that his products can cross the vastness of space.
Barring that, I have 2 cats I can donate to the ransom price.
On behalf of the "aliens", we are not letting him go until he has preached God's Word to us 4 times. These are, and always have been, our demands and we will not compromise.
Dan's Plan A - I've Got Nothin'
Nope, Frank did that.
Plan B - Open Letter to College Football
Doht!
Plan C ... aliens?
No, Dan has not been abducted by aliens. He has been assimilated by the Borg. Resistance was futile.
If the "aliens" are from Mexico, just let the FBI give them a couple of semi-automatic weapons, then they'll release Dan!
They are asking for Utah and "shelf-stable stem cell samples" from Sophia Vergara.
Suggestions?
Are they asking for any Unobtainium? I don't have any... obviously, but I figured I'd ask.
You people don't know who Sophie Vergara is, do you?
I heard a rumor that DJP called up the team and said, "Hey guys, Iv'e been reading some stuff by a guy named Jacobus Arminius. Have you seen this? Looks interesting." After which he disappeared. Just sayin'.
Who?!
Or he could be captivated over at Justin Taylor's blog by those articles on Self-Promotion. Who knows. And maybe The Gospel Coaltion is alient these days.
I fear for what some undisciplined person might do with Utah and those stem cell samples.
we already have 2 books, and many thoughts from Dan, so we probably can suffer the loss for a little time, as Peter said.
we should ask his family what they want us to offer for him.
It takes a lot of enthusiasm to start lectures on promotion and self-promotion on a blog which uses about 80% of its bandwidth to generate traffic by linking to blogs which link to it.
Cent, I am much too sanctified to know the names of Brazilian super-models, thank you very much!
Harumph!
Squirrel
Squirrel,
Isn't she Colombian and not Brazilian?
Frank,
No, we just don't know how cells from the center part of a plant relate to said supermodel.
IT'S A COOKBOOK !!!!!
Are they gullible aliens? Could they be tricked into taking some of Manitoba or the Northwest Territories? Or even Montana?
It's a Twaapp!!!
I concur with Phantom of the Bookstore. And poor DJP (bless his heart) thought those aliens were true converts and were ready to serve man!
Well, I guess that explains why he has this guy who does celebrity Shakespeare readings on his blog today--to keep us busy so we won't bother looking for him!
Being from Utah I would be willing to consider going over to the aliens if they will make a point of preaching people here the true gospel. Do we have the makings of a deal?
(Someone else will have to come up with the stem cells.)
I knew who Sofia Vergara was when she was a blonde on Univisión on a show called "Fuera de Serie." That would have been 2002 or earlier, because when we moved in late 2002 we dropped satellite.
I'm working out a deal for his release. More later
If it doesn't work out, can I have his stuff?
Give them what they want! Who took over H&T? Would they take Joel O in trade?
@Tom Chantry
Why? if they are they can get a drivers license and financial aid for college, for a minimum.
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