05 March 2008

The Bible in the critical eye

by Dan Phillips

I was reading of Jesus' throwing out the merchandisers in Luke 19:45f., and it hit me.

Critics of the Bible reject miracles because nothing can happen only once.

Critics of the Bible reject two Temple cleansings because nothing can happen twice.

...if it's in the Bible.

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27 comments:

Anonymous said...

"Critics of the Bible reject two Temple cleansings because nothing can happen twice.

...if it's in the Bible."

I was thinking more along the lines of "critics of the Bible reject two Temple cleansings because nothing can happen...if it's in the Bible"

Quintin said...

And that's why patience is a gift from God.

DJP said...

Well, Daryl, there's that.

Anonymous said...

I'm jus' sayin'...

ezekiel said...

Sort of like saying "those poor Israelites, God sure got angry with them". Then following that up with "Sure glad He loves me, He would never do anything like that to me".

Anonymous said...

Ezekiel,

LOL!! (But only because that's as true about me as it is about anyone...)

Colin Maxwell said...

In the first clearance, Jesus said that they had turned His Fathers House into a place of merchandise which was a honourable business, but located in the wrong place. In the second clearance, He said that they had turned the temple into a den of thieves - a most dishonourable matter anywhere and at anytime.

Regards,

Stefan Ewing said...

Goodnightsafehome: Good point.

There is one critical detail missing from the Synoptic cleansing (the second chronologically): the part where the money-changers et alia look at each other with heavy (but obviously unconvicted) expressions and say, "Oh no, here he comes again!"

James Scott Bell said...

I'm sorry, but you're approaching this all wrong. Jesus never literally "cleared the temple." This is obviously a metaphor for getting rid of negative thinking in your life. I really feel this to be true, so it must be.

DJP said...

Cool story.

Anonymous said...

Johnny,

No no no, you've gotten it all wrong. Clearly the imagery is that of Jesus driving the Romans out of Palestine (just like the demons in the pigs, remember??).

See, Jesus first over-turned the tables (destruction of Jerusalem, clearly) and then drove out the money-changers (the Romans get tired and leave Palestine).

It's all quite plain when you understand the socio-economic thinking of the Jews at the time.

Solameanie said...

Johnny and Daryl,

No, you're both wrong. Jesus never actually said that. My colored beads told me so.

The Apostle Paul and his followers added that story to the narrative later.

(Joel's tongue firmly planted in cheek)

Stefan Ewing said...

Oh please, don't raise that spectre again, even if in jest!

Stefan Ewing said...

That was in response to Daryl. A wave of latent weariness came over me as I read it.

Anonymous said...

Stefan,

And I, even as I wrote it...

Nash Equilibrium said...

I've read both passages a million times, and I didn't even realize there were two temple cleansings!

greglong said...

I've seen the Biker Jesus, Cowboy Jesus, Football Jesus, Soccer Jesus, Surfer Jesus, and Skater Jesus (see here), but I'm still waiting for Temple-Cleansing Jesus. He would have a whip of cords in his hand. You would pull the string on His back and He would say, "Do not make My Father's house a house of merchandise!" (Oh, wait...)

P.S. Love this headline: Talking Jesus Nearly Vanishes

Strong Tower said...

What I want to know is did he use the whip to turn over the tables like Indy would have...

Did you ever notice that Indy never loses his whip? For some reason that makes for a cool Jesus image with a whip hanging from his sash and all...do think the RC's have it stuck away in some relic box, hmmm?

Stefan Ewing said...

Stratagem:

I knew they were at chronologically different points in the Synoptics (Matthew, Mark, and Luke) and John (end and beginning of Christ's earthly public ministry respectively), but I accepted the hypothesis that they were different versions of the same event.

That, I realize now, is making a mockery of the Holy Spirit in His inspirational working through the Evangelists; and/or accusing either the Synoptic authors or John of pious fraud.

Solameanie said...

I wonder how they would depict the Jesus who says "Depart from Me, all you who work iniquity."

Of course, the Jesus Seminar would probably disavow those words as being from the Lord, but I quit playing with colored marbles after about age two.

I actually think someone should begin an investigation of that august body of "scholars." I think we'd probably catch them playing Ouija Board instead of studying Scripture. Maybe even playing Parker Bros' "Twister."

James Scott Bell said...

Or "Balderdash."

Stefan Ewing said...

Is there a game called "Stumbling Block"?

Chris said...

In both instances, Jesus directs attention to a desireable mindset His followers should have--a standard of holiness, of God's sovereignty, and of sinful mans' necessity to approach God's Holiness with reverence, humilty and awe! Of course, the mindset and disposition among emergent liberals is low on ethos and integrity, yet big on arrogance and fallacious reasoning; it is empty of humility and gluttoned with pride; it hates wisdom and embraces folly; it condemns and imprisons itself in bondage through every word of its pseudo-liberation. It glorifies man and ATTEMPTS to make the creator God a servant. It, the spirit of this age, hates the very God it deceptively claims to follow.

Solameanie said...

I know there's a game called "Liar's Poker."

Here are some other good ones. I especially think the one called "Superstition" would probably be found in their parlor.

S.J. Walker said...

Luke 19:45? Twister? Balderdash?

Oh boy.

A Lion Has Roared!

Strong Tower said...

djp- Have you read all of Dr. Carson's book?

This section's great, and timely too with the John 3:16 Conference happening- thanks.

Theophilus said...

>Re: the whip.

>think the RC's have it stuck away in >some relic box, hmmm?

It'll show up on Antiques Road-show some day. Wait! I should check my attic!

Did I ever mention that I saw an actual indulgence for sale in "Value Village" (a thrift / second-hand store) for something under $10.

I was giggling all day.