PyroManiacs: Setting the World on fire. `Is not My word like a fire?` says the LORD (Jeremiah 23:29).

26 May 2009

My Big Fat English Announcement

by Dan Phillips

Over the past couple of months, I gave a couple of intimations on Facebook of an imminent announcement. Turns out that I was a bit of a typical dispensationalist if I used the word "imminent," as it froze in a state of impending.

Until now.
One last time, I mentioned on Facebook Monday that I planned actually to make the announcement here today. A "watch thread" was started at my blog, featuring some ...er... very creative (and fanciful) investigative work.
Now, I am glad and grateful to be able to take this occasion to make a shameless, self-centered (uncharacteristically so, I hope) use of this precious platform to announce that, after years — nay, decades — of dreaming and wishing, and more than one failed attempt, I have been given the humbling opportunity of a lifetime.

Last January, I was approached by a long-time Pyro lurker, who asked me whether I had any interest in writing a book.

And I said Boy, did I!

And the really cool thing is that he was senior acquisitions editor for David C. Cook.

Fast forward: we talked, discussed some ideas; he helped me with a proposal... and now I have a signed contract and advance in my sweaty little hand!

Now if you want to proceed directly to the title-and-topic guessing portion of today's party....

(You do have to have a sense of humor to play.)

UPDATE: we've had some pretty marvelous title recommendations — just about the most fun I've had since this.

Here's a selection:

Stratagem
"Phillips' 66 Books of the Bible"
"Postmodern Bible Study: Passages that are Sworda Unclear"
"Continualist Christians in a World of Famine for the Word of God"
"The Secret Message of McLaren"
"An Old (Bald) Kind of Christian"
"The Book of not-so-Common Hair"
"Your Best Life Now - Then What?"
"Domesticated at Heart"
"They Like Jesus, But They Don't Like the Church, Dan Phillips, or Pretty Much Anybody Else Who Tells Them What They Don't Wanna Hear"
"Phillips Milk of Amnesia: Remembering What We Shouldn't Have Forgotten (as Soon as I Remember What it Was)"
"Got Milk? Red Meat From the Word"
"Pomo Wars: Daniel in the Lyin' Den"
"Left Behind: Places Where I'd Like to Kick Pomo Authors"
"The Pomo's Progress; from This World to... well, we're really not sure..."
"The Manger: Why What Happened There, Means We Don't Need The Shack"
"What Would Jesus Don't: Why the Ten Commandments Still Apply"
LeeC
"Reading Jonathan Edwards for fun and Spiritual Profit"


Mesa Mike
"Costco Frozen Meat Chub vs. Fresh Red Meat: Contrasting Law and Gospel"
Brian Sporer
"Go back under your bridge: The comprehensive guide for dealing with trolls"
Hayden
'Why the KJV Bible is the Only Inspired Bible: A Journey'
greglong
"Don't Waste Your Knife: A Dispensationalist Rightly Divides the Word of Truth"
"CalviDispieBaptoGelicalism: Even Better Than Doing Things Like Ministry"
"Phillips' 66: A Bibely Commentary"
Benjamin Nitu
"Truth, huh, yeah / What is it good for?"
Trinian
"This Book Has Been Deleted by Blog Administrator: A First-Hand Encounter With Postmodern Tolerance"
Daryl
"Why Every Self Respecting Calvinist is a Dispensationalist"
"Dan Phillips Study Bible — in Engrish"
"Hard to Believe : An Emergent commentary from Genesis to Revelation"
Associate-to-the-Pastor
"Covenant, Schmovenant!"
"The Trail of Blood, Part II: A Study on the effects of My Kung-Fu on Dave Hunt's Kung Fu (A Pop-Up Book!)"
"NEXT!: A Bathroom Reader"
"The Snack : When Pizza and God Collide"
"The Gospel According to Star Trek"
"Don't Be Hatin': An Apology for Christian Hip-Hop"
Jugulum
"Herding Cats: The Life of a Pyro Meta Moderator"
Dan Phillips's signature

202 comments:

1 – 200 of 202   Newer›   Newest»
Mike Riccardi said...

Dude...

VcdeChagn said...

ummm...then it is a pastorate...finally :D

Anonymous said...

42?

NoLongerBlind said...

......have become an Amil, Covenant Theologian.







?

Rick Frueh said...

...am taking a two year vow of silence.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

...have finally convinced my wife to let me buy a motorcycle.

NoLongerBlind said...

have written a book on how to merge dispensationalism with Continuationist, PostMil Arminianism.

Greg Linscott said...

I'm guessing he either has taken a position as Richard Abanes' Administrative Assistant or has become to Joel Osteen what Phil is to MacArthur... ;-)

GrayDave said...

What's the point of posting this? Say what you have to say or don't.

Chad V. said...

That you're really the creepy old dancing guy on the Six Flags commercials?

Matt said...

Crossed the Tiber with Beckwith?

DJP said...

Now, that's nasty.

Associate-to-the-Pastor said...

...have finally found something to grow my hair back.


Just kidding. I bet it's a book getting published!

Al said...

... have taken on a new life verse. Proverbs 12:25 Anxiety in the heart of man causes depression, But a good word makes it glad.

why are y'all so sad?

al sends

LanternBright said...

...have finally joined the circus as the leader of a troupe of fireaters?

Kim said...

I'm thinking that the word "English" must mean you're getting a book published.

Anonymous said...

GrayDave,

May I suggest drinking your morning coffee and THEN posting?

Have a little fun with this, everyone else is.

Connie said...

...love messing with people's minds!!! :-)

DJP said...

Sherlock Kimvery clever, but it's mainly a play on this.

It might be taken to rule out the publication of an entirely new Greek grammar, or another volume in the Moulton-Howard-Turner series, or a one-man critical edition of the Greek New Testament.

Might be.

Anonymous said...

...am publishing the "Dan Phillips Study Bible"...in Engrish.

FX Turk said...

... become an elder at a presbyterian church affiliated with Doug Wilson's pack of hypercovenantal paedocommunionist potato-babdiss churches.

FX Turk said...

btw Dan: this is completely not right. Stringing people on like this breeds ill-will.






Of course, I am enjoying the ruse as much as anyone.

NoLongerBlind said...

.......the the Darwin Award?

DJP said...

Well, Frank, I am updating it periodically. It's not like a totally heartless, manipulative maniac.



Not totally.

Jugulum said...

"after years — nay, decades — of dreaming and wishing, and more than one failed attempt, I have been given"

"It's time for your treatment, Dan," his handler interrupted.

Dan replied, "Did I fall asleep?"

DJP said...

< looks around room frantically for Jug-o-vision camera >

DJP said...

Frank Turkbtw Dan: this is completely not right. Stringing people on like this breeds ill-willbabelfish translation — Hot burning creosote coals, why didn't I think of this?!

Anonymous said...

I'm losing interest, this is taking too long. Alfred Hitchcock you ain't, Dan...

:-)

DJP said...

Ayy, caught in the MTV backlash.

candy said...

You are just downright mean. Do you have siblings? You probably have siblings that you dangled goodies over their heads while taunting them as a child....or perhaps they did that to you and you are finally retaliating in a sort of perverse way.

Anonymous said...

...A play on "My Big Fat Greek Wedding"...hmmm...you've been given a bibopsy and that lump in your neck is your twin!

Kim said...

Hmph! Alrighty then!

*sprays Dan with Windex.*

DJP said...

Candy - you say that like it's a bad thing.

EMommy - creepiest suggestion so far. You've been looking at titles on my other bookshelf.

And seriously, if anyone finds this that annoying - sorry. Truly. Feel free to ignore it. It's a once-in-a-lifetime for me, and I'll have some fun with it. If it's not fun for you, I am genuinely sorry, and won't at all blame you for doing something that is.

Kim said...

Frank, I'm sure that in the future when you have a big announcement to make, you will be most adept at stringing us along... perhaps even more effectively than Dan.

Anonymous said...

No worries, DJP. This is light-hearted fun over our morning coffee. Opa!

NoLongerBlind said...

...the humbling opportunity.....

to join the list of Ig Nobel Prize Winners!

Solameanie said...

Dan has been asked to replace Chester Thompson to drum-duet with Phil Collins on the next Genesis tour. Chester will be busy teaching drum clinics at Belmont College.

beachbirdie said...

...and asked to take a seat on the Supreme Court...

Anonymous said...

Who is Doug Wilson? Opa!

Anonymous said...

...by a tall hairy creature, some would call Bigfoot. Since then I have had exclusive rights to his biegraphy.
Having just completed the "Yeti" version, we will be going to print shortly.

donsands said...

"The suspense is terrible. I hope it will last."~ Willy Wonka

I hope it's a pastoral calling.

Herding Grasshoppers said...

You're writing a Greek dictionary.

Or you're oldest unmarried child is marrying a Greek.

But I'm going with the dictionary.

Although (Rick Frueh) I laughed out loud at your suggestion Dan take a two year vow of silence. Would that prohibit writing, or just speech?

DJP said...

My oldest unmarried child is 13.

(c;

Herding Grasshoppers said...

You've accepted a pastorate in Greece, and your first official duty (gleefully avoided by the outgoing pastor) will be the wedding-that-ate-Miami?

Julie

The Squirrel said...

Tease!

(o:

~Squirrel

Anonymous said...

Have you been offered a teaching position?

Herding Grasshoppers said...

Indeed.

Well then, let us hope the wedding is not your child's :0)

DJP said...

E-Mommy — certainly a teaching opportunity.

NoLongerBlind said...

...about the opportunity to temporarily fill in for Joel Osteen while he takes another book-writing sabbatical.

Herding Grasshoppers said...

You're compiling the Pyro posts into a book.

There will be a glossary, including all the words and abbreviations you have invented.

olan strickland said...

If it's not fun for you, I am genuinely sorry, and won't at all blame you for doing something that is.OK so I refreshed my computer six times; I ran an internet connection diagnostics test six times; and I turned my computer off and on six times attempting to get it to download the rest of the story!

6-6-6!

Last January, I was approached by the devil and asked to be the __________.

Kristine said...

I'm with Don....

The suspence is wonderful & I'm hoping it's a pastoral/teaching gig.

Herding Grasshoppers said...

The Pyro book will take on epic proportions and have a following (like your beloved Star Trek) who go around speaking your invented language.

Nash Equilibrium said...

FINALLY! I'm glad I've held my piece until now. I've FINALLY figured it out. It's all so obvious once I remembered that Leno is leaving the Tonight Show!

Anonymous said...

You're taking over Debate Blog.

The Squirrel said...

Publication of The Official Dispensationalists' End Times Pizza Cookbook!

~Squirrel

J♥Yce Burrows said...

Torture. Sheer torture, Dan. The administration could do well to have you offer suggestions for enhanced interrogation techniques. hehehe

DJP said...

You know, you East-coasties also have to figure in that some West-coasties are just waking up and getting to the internets. They've already missed six updates.

NoLongerBlind said...

"...was approached by a long-time..." associate who happens to be a producer on TBN about my dream job, to become a regularly featured host of this show!

David Dittmer said...

My guess... he's writing a book on Calvinistic Dispensationalism...

MarieP said...

Yes, but just how long does it take to write a book on Calvinistic dispensationalism? ;-)

olan strickland said...

Congratulations Dan...whatever it is! I'm going out to celebrate the rest of the day in your honor - fishing at St. Andrews State Park in Panama City, Florida!

Jay said...

publication of your first book "40 Wild at Heart Days of My Best Purpose Driven Life Now"

MarieP said...

Whoa, Jay Leno posts on your site????

DJP said...

Jay's comment reminds me: we had a fun title-thread oncet.

(That's Southern for "once.")

Herding Grasshoppers said...

Jay -

And it will be in GREEK.

David Dittmer said...

MarieP, since Dispensationalism is completely unbiblical, it shouldn't take long at all to write about it. :P

Rachael Starke said...

I CUT MY MORNING WORKOUT SHORT TO COME BACK AND READ - THIS???

I so want a refund.

DJP said...

Next time, Rachael, admission price - 50% discount. On me.

The Squirrel said...

That's it! Enough blogwatching! I'll check back before bedtime to find out what the hubbub was all about!

(o:

~Squirrel

J♥Yce Burrows said...

six updates ~ at this drip rate, should we check back tomorrow lest we wear out refreshing?

;-)

Nik P said...

You guys... it's so obvious! Dan has been given the lifetime opportunity to

Gilbert said...

Dan,

After slamming me thoroughly and into the mud on your blog, I still have to congratulate you for being nominated as the Editor-In-Chief for the Sacramento Bee.

Sorry. Local joke.

Herding Grasshoppers said...

Oh Squirrel,

It's like a train wreck... you know you can't look away.

Okay, my idea is developing:

Dan writes a Greek commentary but has decided to make it a piece of Performance Art.

He'll be taking it on the road with the Meshugga (what were they called?) Band.

Julie

Mike Westfall said...

The big announcement is that you've developed debilitating cramps in your fingers, but you were able to struggle with it to write half a post about having to quit blogging before they gave out completely?

MarieP said...

Mesa Mike, ROFL!

No, actually the announcement is that he had to revert back to using dial-up because of rising prices in CA.

Herding Grasshoppers said...

No, wait...

Dan has a bet on with Frank and Phil about who can drive the comments up to 100 the fastest.

This is Dan's run for the gold.

And, I'd like my share in the prize...

Julie

Nash Equilibrium said...

See? I told you it was the Tonight Show!

MarieP said...

Maybe Dan is going to be the president of Ovaltine...

DJP said...

Nik's right!

And Greek!

The Squirrel said...

Julie!

Dan's going on tour with Meshugga Beach Party? Great!

I'm off to TicketMasters to find a show near me!

/o:

~Squirrel

Nash Equilibrium said...

Gilbert: No, that's not a local joke. I'm in Ohio and the SFBee is a joke even out here. And a soon to be historical joke, at that.

Herding Grasshoppers said...

See, I knew you couldn't look away.

I, sadly, will have to gather my boys in just a couple of minutes, and resume my attempts to civilize and educate them.

Let me know how it all comes out...

Julie

DJP said...

Joyceat this drip rate, should we check back tomorrow lest we wear out refreshing?

I swear, you kids who watch MTV. If a scene takes longer than two seconds, you change channels.

/c:

NoLongerBlind said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Gary said...

anticipa








tion

Al said...

Last January, I was approached by a long-time Pyro lurker, who asked me whether I...

... had a sure fire way to drive up the hits on a blog without actually posting any content.

"Yes I do," says Dan!

al sends

CR said...

I wonder if that "lurker" is John MacArthur and he asked Dan to teach at Masters Seminary?

DJP said...

Shh! Too early!

Staci Eastin said...

You know what? You're just mean. I have other things to do today.

As for the people on the west coast, those of us in the Midwest have to wait for them to get their votes counted during the elections. It all evens out.

Andrew Faris said...

...thought it would be a good idea to post one of the most annoying announcement messages in the history of the internet.


It's the old dilemma of watching people do really gross stuff (not sexually gross, just plain old disgusting). You don't want to watch, but you just can't seem to turn your head...

Andrew

DJP said...

Sorry you see it that way, Andrew. See 6:41 AM, May 26, 2009 comment.

DJP said...

Rachael Starke was actually the first to call it, with eerie accuracy, like months ago. How does she know these things?

Carl said...

...have been asked to be the general manager of the L.A. Clippers?

...am going to star in the remake of "The Cross & The Switchblade" to be directed by Quinten Terratino's brother, Guido?

...have been named by Barack Obama to be the ambassador to Moosylvania?

...won a dream vacation to Sopchoppy, Florida?

:-)

Gary said...

From elsewhere...


Rachael Starke:
Well, I already called book deal a couple weeks back, but I'm going with Gil's suggestion that you're running for governor.

Hope and change is coming back to California!!
May 25, 2009 4:41:00 PM PDT

FX Turk said...

Kim --

If I ever have an announcement like to to make, I'd explode before I could keep anyone in suspense.

It's becuase I have a lot more pride than Dan does, and a lot less inhibition. I am clearly the weaker brother.

Aaron said...

DJP: You gave it away by process of elimination. You didn't leave too many possibilities open for guessing. The only details were waiting for is the topic of the book, the publishing date, and the identity of the mysterious "lurker". Although given enough time, I'm sure somebody could research or guess the identity.

BTW, John MacArthur has said he doesn't read blogs unless somebody prints them out for him or something to that effect. So I seriously doubt he's the "lurker."

Carl said...

Congratulatons on the book deal. I'm sure you'll do well in writing about the migration patterns of the Borneo swallow. :-)

DJP said...

Hey! That's supposed to be TOP-SECRET!

NoLongerBlind said...

..........and, it's the sequel to this!

UinenMaia said...

Sir Aaron: good point, but who could be more of a lurker than someone who has the posts printed out for him?

DJP: I missed the first 5 updates and thought maybe it was something with our firewall software here at school. So I logged out through it just in time to catch update six, allowing me to erroneously conclude that it was our system that was driving me crazy, not your teasing. Glad I didn't call the tech department to rant before I caught on!

Congratulations on the book. Nobody deserves it more.

DJP said...

That's very kind of you; thank you!

Yeah, for awhile, my work blocked Blogger. Period. That was a bad time.

Then some lawyer VIP said he needed Blogger for business purposes, and bang! Back in bidness.

Kevin Jackson said...

Dan,

Congratulations! We are anticipating with 'bated breath this new book. Unfortunately it will be released one sentence at a time over the course of several years. I just hope I live to see the end of it.

Anonymous said...

"I'm glad I've held my piece until now." Too easy.

No, but seriously, haven't you said that you wanted to write a book on Proverbs?

Anonymous said...

Felicidades!

Herding Grasshoppers said...

You da man, Dan.

Anonymous said...

Yes, I'd like to schedule a book signing and be a part of the blogging book tour please.

DJP said...

Thanks, Julie and Gringa; that's very sweet.

Yes, jmb, but this isn't it. Yet! However, you might expect some references to Proverbs!

gods.geek - ouch. No, I've actually already drafted what I expect to be the hardest portion — the first six chapters.

I do say "expect" for a reason, though.

Andrew Faris said...

DJP,

I wondered if my sarcasm/totally-not-actually-annoyedness-but-just-trying-to-be-funnyness would get lost in my comment.

Not seriously that annoying at all. Just messing around, or else I would've followed your advice from that comment.

And congratulations, Dan. I pray that the Lord will use your book to edify our brothers and sisters and bring glory to Him. I also pray that you will grow in the Lord throughout the writing process.

I have always thought you to be a fantastic writer, even when I really disagree with you, so I imagine it will be a good one.

Andrew

Mike Westfall said...

Proceeding to the "guess-the-title-and-topic" phase, is it going to be a new Boz the Bear book? Boz's Big Book of CalviDispieBaptoGelicalism?

James Joyce said...

The new book?

"NEXT! - How to poke bible skeptics with a pointed stick in 50words or less."

Michelle said...

"Homeschooling: Yes You Can"

or

"The Underground Homeschool: A Guide"

David Regier said...

I can't wait to go down to Berean and check out all the little DJP trinkets next to the Prayer of Jabez wind chimes and Joel Osteen baby wipes warmers.

Anonymous said...

I want the bobble-head doll!

And the DJP flame-thrower.

Kristine said...

Many congrats, Mr. Phillips :)

Anonymous said...

So....when's the book giveaway happenin'?

Jeremy Weaver said...

I'm sure it will have absolutely nothing to do with grammatical-historical hermeneutics.

Congratulations.

Anonymous said...

Can I pre-order yet?

I'm thinking it's along the lines of believing what the bible says and not what we think it ought to, or could.

Nash Equilibrium said...

"Phillips' 66 Books of the Bible"

"Continualist Christians in a World of Famine for the Word of God"

"The Secret Message of McLaren"

"An Old (Bald) Kind of Christian"

"Your Best Life Now - Then What?"

"Domesticated at Heart"

"They Like Jesus, But They Don't Like the Church, Dan Phillips, or Pretty Much Anybody Else Who Tells Them What They Don't Wanna Hear"

"Phillips Milk of Amnesia: Remembering What We Shouldn't Have Forgotten (as Soon as I Remember What it Was)"

"Got Milk? Red Meat From the Word"

??

DJP said...

Stratagem — you ... ROCK.

srsly, I'm in awe.

That comment is now in Wiki under "Tour de force."

Anonymous said...

Just so's there's at least one lense flare on the cover...

LeeC said...

"Reading Jonathan Edwards for fun and Spiritual Profit"

Mike Westfall said...

"Costco Frozen Meat Chub vs. Fresh Red Meat: Contrasting Law and Gospel"

Jay said...

"How to wear a Pyromaniac t-shirt through airport security"

"And the name of this book is...."

Nash Equilibrium said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
FX Turk said...

Title:

Hijacked again: my friendship with Frank Turk and why I loathe himTopic:

off-topic.

DJP said...

Not a chance. They'd have to get another author for that one.

I'd write the rebuttal.

Nash Equilibrium said...

"The Porpoise-Driven Life: Underwater Continualist Revelations Received While Scuba-Diving"

"The Manger: Why What Happened There, Means We Don't Need The Shack"

(had a typo in that last one, first time through!)

Number 15 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
donsands said...

"..I have a signed contract and advance in my sweaty little hand!"

Sweet!

J♥Yce Burrows said...

I swear, you kids who watch MTV. If a scene takes longer than two seconds, you change channels. lol, only know of MTV in passing but loved that you kids reference. More the Charlie Chan, Sherlock Holmes, or other mysteries type...or Ma & Pa Kettle, thank you. :-)

It was fun anticipating...and CONGRATULATIONS! Lord willing, I'd stand in a long line for a book by you on Proverbs yet would love to read one with references to Proverbs. Suuuure hope the publisher give you a manuscript deadline. No pressure by Pyro fans. not. much. ;-)

Number 15 said...

I swear, you kids who watch MTV. If a scene takes longer than two seconds, you change channels.How many ADHD folks does it take to change a light bulb?

Hey! Wanna ride bikes?!?

Brian Sporer said...

Title:

Go back under your bridge: The comprehensive guide for dealing with trolls.

Brian

J♥Yce Burrows said...

give=gave

Hayden said...

'Why the KJV Bible is the Only Inspired Bible: A Journey'

Rachael Starke said...

Woohoo!!!

As for how I knew, well,

((ahem))

I've been praying in that specific, direction for quite some time.

But before y'all send me your own lists for Jabez-ish prayer requesdts, you should know that in the past, when I've prayed rather generally for God's blessing on my friends in ministry, it's occasionally resulted in almost immediate, gut-wrenching trial. So with Dan I was quite specific about the types of blessing, and am thankful God answered accordingly.

I'd offer up my own title suggestions, but Strategem's are so blindingly brilliant I'm just going to quite while I'm ahead.

Nash Equilibrium said...

"Pomo Wars: Daniel in the Lyin' Den"

Herding Grasshoppers said...

A book on mawwiage? In Greek?

Or am I reading too much into your Post Title?

greglong said...

Don't Waste Your Knife: A Dispensationalist Rightly Divides the Word of Truth

CalviDispieBaptoGelicalism: Even Better Than Doing Things Like Ministry

Phillips' 66: A Bibely Commentary

Ben N said...

Truth, huh, yeah
What is it good for?

Trinian said...

This Book Has Been Deleted by Blog Administrator: A First-Hand Encounter With Postmodern Tolerance

Anonymous said...

Why Every Self Respecting Calvinist is a Dispensationalist.

Chad V. said...

"Why Every Self Respecting Calvinist is a Dispensationalist." ???????!!!!!!!!!!

Oh please Dan, not that!

DJP said...

Whoa; Strategem looks over his shoulder, sees Greg Long coming on strong and gaining.

Associate-to-the-Pastor said...

Covenant, Schmovenant!

Dr. Strangehair: or, How I learned to Stop Worrying and Just Love Prevenient Grace.

The Trail of Blood, Part II: A Study on the effects of My Kung-Fu on Dave Hunt's Kung Fu (A Pop-Up Book!)

NEXT!: A Bathroom Reader

DJP said...

Oh my.

...Greg Long, who looks over HIS shoulder and sees....


(That NEXT! title is actually a pretty good idea)

Mike Riccardi said...

Knowing Your Author, by Phil Johnson.

I like Trinian's a whole lot.

Nash Equilibrium said...

Frankanphil: How Two Blogging Buddies Created a Publishing Monster"

Nash Equilibrium said...

"Left Behind: Places Where I'd Like to Kick Pomo Authors"

Jugulum said...

Herding Cats: The Life of a Pyro Meta Moderator

DJP said...

You guys are making this a lot of fun for me, thanks. Most fun, I think, since this.

Anonymous said...

This has got to be the most entertaining thread ever.

Nash Equilibrium said...

I used to read Purgatorio, too. It was a great site!

That picture brings to mind another possible title:

"The Book of not-so-Common Hair"

Nash Equilibrium said...

Or how about:

"Postmodern Bible Study: Passages that are Sworda Unclear"

Anonymous said...

Hard to Believe : An Emergent commentary from Genesis to Revelation.

Associate-to-the-Pastor said...

The Snack : When Pizza and God Collide

The Gospel According to Star Trek

The Late, Great Planet Jerk: Thoughts on the Death of Postmodern Epistemology

Don't Be Hatin': An Apology for Christian Hip-Hop

Associate-to-the-Pastor said...

I actually need to work... (not a title, just reminding myself.

DJP said...

Wouldn't be a bad title.

Actually, it would almost work as a subtitle for my book.

(c;

Nash Equilibrium said...

"The Pomo's Progress; from This World to... well, we're really not sure..."

"Hounds Feet in Hydrant Places"

Nash Equilibrium said...

"What Would Jesus Don't: Why the Ten Commandments Still Apply"

J♥Yce Burrows said...

God's Grace Plus Me: when I actually need to work

Nash Equilibrium said...

"Chicken Soup for the Non-Pentecostal Calvinist Biblical-Inerrancy-Believing Christian Soul - Chunky Edition"

"Chicken Soup for the Postmodern Christian Author's Soul"
Subtitle: "aka, Mostly Broth"

Michelle said...

"No More Excuses: Pastoring and Biblical Accountability"

"When Gay Meant Happy: The Great Perversion Embrace"

Herding Grasshoppers said...

Oh,Jugulum... Herding Cats???

Rachael Starke said...

Can't. Stop. Laughing.

Strategem for Pyro Court Jester!

And thanks for the ab workout that I missed this morning...

Jugulum said...

HG,

"Herding Cats" is a more common phrase than "Herding Grasshoppers".

UinenMaia said...

Hither and Thither: A CalviDispieBaptoGelical Takes on the Culture One Lens-Flared Issue at a Time


On a side note, most of these book titles you guys have been coming up with just cry out to be written - at least the first chapter.

J♥Yce Burrows said...

- and + Me: reminding myself when I couldn't work and must yield effectively

Betrothed(or Beloved): (insert above after : or) foreloved help meet for Him
Grace basics

Grace notes


hmmmmm, definitely need more clues.

J♥Yce Burrows said...

Grace Basics

Grace Notes

(html tag issues)

Angus said...

One Frank would go for from his many posts on the topic...

"I Like Cheeses but Love the Church: Delights in Converging Congregations"

Anonymous said...

"LOLCats Study Bible"

"Phillips' Paraphrase of the Message Bible"

"Lego Mi Ego: Greek Grammer For Punsters, Jokesters, and Mark Driscol"

"I Can't Believe It's Not Bell!" (Random words thrown together in grammatcially correct patterns. Just like reading Emerg*** drivel with less of a chance of heretical teachings!)

chopstickschan said...

Engrish, huh? I thought you would be writing it in Japanese. Congrats, Dan! I'm sure you'll go where no man has gone before...

chopstickschan said...

"How I Just Burned My Banana Bread Because I Was So Engrossed in Reading This Thread" Bonus: Helpful Hints on Forgetting to Set the Timer

Angus said...

I think it may be on preaching or pastoral ministry:

"Sacred Space: A Hands-On Guide to Crafting Scriptural Preaching Experiences for Passionate Saints"

(thought of taking that in a Star Tek direction, but others have done it better...)

Carl said...

So when are the Pyro trading cards going to be marketed? Who's gonna produce 'em? Topps? Fleer? Upper Deck?

Angus said...

Stretching similar titles again:

"Reviving Arius: Tainting the Christian Faith"

Think that's me done...looking forward to finding out what it is...I know I'll be getting a copy regardless..

Rhology said...

-"The Manger: Why What Happened There, Means We Don't Need The Shack"
"What Would Jesus Don't: Why the Ten Commandments Still Apply"
-

Those are awesome! LOL!!!!

Colloquist said...

Dan, this is really terrific news! Congratulations! Count me in for at least 4 copies: my own, one for the church, one for the library, and a spare for after I've highlighted and underlined the first copy to death. :) It's guaranteed to be a standout amongst the slim pickin's in the local Christian bookstore!

Susan said...

1. The Phillips Anthology of Poetry, Vol. I: Haikus on the Obama Administration, 2009-2012.

2. I AM getting an autographed copy from you.

Gilbert said...

My first book...Proverb-ially speaking"

Gilbert said...

Post-modern Christianity: epic FAIL!

philness said...

Dan,

A good discipleship curriculum would be nice.

Herding Grasshoppers said...

C'mon Dan, bust it out... it's getting late.

What's the topic?

NoLongerBlind said...

It's already tomorrow for us East-Coasties; we're either goin' to bed or already sleepin'.

Are you gonna spill the beans about the title/topic, or not?

Give a bleary-eyed guy a break, will ya?

%~\

Steve Scott said...

The Purpose-Driven Shack for Dummies.

Unknown said...

I am biased. I like "An Old (Bald) Kind of Christian" as me and Dan share similar hair lines.

DJP said...

Well hey - nobody asked until now!

(c;

The actual title won't be settled until later in the process, though I have a provisional one in mind.

Forgive me for being a bit vague at this point. I'll certainly share more, Lord willing, further along.

The basic focus is the Gospel, with special emphasis on rooting it in the whole Bible, and showing its impact on worldview and on our rules of engagement (i.e. sanctification and service/outreach/doing).

Nash Equilibrium said...

Uh oh - you started it again!

"The Prayer of Jabberz: Glossalalia Gone Wild"

"Henhouse Church: Continualist Clucks Come Home to Roost"

Don't worry - I'm too busy today to do this :)

NoLongerBlind said...

"...(i.e. sanctification and service/outreach/doing)".

Ohhhhh, I see. So it IS, uh,
sort of Missional, yeah, that's it!

The real Dan is emerging out of the cocoon!

DJP said...

Ya, you betcha.

But in an emphatically Bibley way.

NoLongerBlind said...

"The basic focus is the Gospel, with special emphasis on rooting it in the whole Bible"

This is going to be awesome, Dan.

I wonder if posts like this, or perhaps this, were the genesis of the idea in this yet-to-be-named lurker's mind.

I'll be looking forward to this, Dan! Put me down for an autographed copy!

DJP said...

Well, I'm just not sure he wants to be named, until we see whether the book justifies the risk he's taking.

(c;

jimlas said...

"Ointment for the itching ear"

Jugulum said...

Dan,

Hmm... Will that include exegetical treatment of "obey the gospel"?

Herding Grasshoppers said...

Count me in... the line, that is, for an autographed copy :0)

Congratulations again,

Julie

Jay said...

Trying (and likely failing) my hand at creating a humorous title:

Hither and Thither: Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Meta."

DJP said...

My book will never be as good as some of these titles.

Anonymous said...

"The Curse...er, Prayer of Elisha - Hope for the Follicley Challenged"

"Anti-Nomianists, Legalists, and Other Homies Jesus Don't Get Down Wid!"

"If You Love Me You Will Keep My Commandments." Why Jesus was Really a Playa Hata!

trogdor said...

This thread needs a 200th comment. Here you go.

Oh, and congrats on the book.

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