Dear College Football,
You know: between January and August inclusively, more or less, I can count on Twitter being veritably alive with the tweets of good men and pastors who are prep'ing for Bible Study and Sermons on Friday, Saturday and Sunday. It can actually get unnerving to get Tweet-preached by roughly 100 guys who take their duties as pastors and fathers and husbands seriously -- in a good way.
And then on that first Saturday of College Football ...
... I mean: it's like the Egyptians brought Leeks and Garlic to the Red Sea rather than the chariots.
What I am not saying is that ever watching sports is a sin -- or that enjoying sports is a sin. Hating Futball (that's Soccer to you ign'ant Americans) is a kind of sin, but that's not my point. My point is that there's something strange that happens when College Football season starts, and it shows up on even the best of men with the most formidable spiritual lives.
Because I trust their faith and not yours, I hold you responsible. Do something about that -- after you make sure the Razorbacks get a good bowl slot this year, you stingy, jaded, biased and possibly conspiratorial malcontent.
Woo Pig Sooey.